Hello, My name is Joanne and I've been a single mum since 2006 to my 2 lovely boys who are now 8 and 9 years old. This looks like a great site - wish I'd have found it or something like many years ago. I'll tell you more on the my story bit if you're interested Smile

Posted on: August 20, 2013 - 3:37pm
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi Joanne11 and welcome to One Space Smile

For people who want to read your story they can go here, where I have left you a brief message, but wanted to write more fully to you here, so that it all stays in one thread. Smile

You really have been through an awful lot, but used it to your advantage and by sounds of things come out the other end, qualified, in control and happy!

I think you will be able to add a lot of support to many members on our boards and hopefully find support for yourself too. You mentioned in the other thread that your fears include not being able to cope with the teenage rebellion that may occur, I used to dread that, my daughter is now 18 and it has been difficult and occasionally still is, however touch wood she was never as bad as I was!

How are your boys now, do they get along?

Posted on: August 20, 2013 - 5:23pm


Hi Anna, Thanks for the reply.

My boys are very good boys at the moment thankfully, they bicker like any children and I'm just going through that worrying stage of letting them out on their own and letting them have some independence (so hard lol!) but in general they are polite and happy boys.

My main childcare is my parents and when my ex husband is around and he has them at the weekends it is at his mum's house (his dad unfortunately died 2 years ago but he was a big influence on my boys and spent alot of time with them) so they have lots of support other than me and their dad which I think is really important. 

I hope they continue to have respect for people and carry many of the values and morals that they have grown up with but whilst finding the right ones for them and their life too, so i'm expecting a few battles along the way whilst they do that Tongue Out

Posted on: August 20, 2013 - 6:16pm

Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi Joanne11, just been reading your story on the other thread. Welcome along!

I have brought up two boys (now 18 and 23) and yes it is challenging but they have turned out great. I would say the main tip I can give you is "boundaries" I don't mean being overly-strict but making sure they continue to know who is boss, even though they get considerably taller than you! It's normal for boys to want to cleave to their dad when they reach the age of 13 or so...after all he is the main person who will show them how to be a man but it sounds as if the two of you are working together as parents anyway.

But yes, I have been tearing my hair out many a time.

You're right about the independence. I reckon the secret is to look at where they are at now, think about what the next stage will be, and help them try out things in that respect. One of the biggest milestones is secondary school and you can be thinking about building your eldest boy towards that and the skills he will need in terms of getting himself around, organising his stuff and having bits of time on his own. Scary, eh?

Posted on: August 21, 2013 - 6:57am