Will I regret keeping this child?

Hi TLD

I don't envy your position, it is a tough time and the decision is the hardest you may ever have to make.

When I got pregnant I was still with the father of the child but our relationship was not healthy and even though we had been together 4 years, I felt that it would not be the best thing to bring a child into this world, I went to the clinic for a termination, but when the nurse asked me if I was sure that this was what I really wanted I broke down and realised that although my relationship was bad, I was in a terrible financial state and lived miles away from family, I wanted that baby. I worked at my relationship again and again for 5 years, but to no avail! So I became a single parent and do you know what my daughter has been the best thing ever to happen to me, times have been REALLY hard and we have been through the mill, but I wouldn't have it any other way. Sometimes when she was small i thought i had been selfish and regretted my decision, which was hard, but now she is older I see that it was all worth it, we got through! I now work earning decent money, we have a lovely home and she is excelling in school.

But what I wanted to say was a few years ago, I got pregnant again with my ex (I know....it was a stupid 2 weeks of momentary loss of mind) I was confused and although I always wanted to provide a sibling for my girl, I didn't feel my ex deserved to have another child seeing as he was crap with the first one. (some could say that i was playing god, but i would be the one left holding the baby) ANYWAY when I went to the doctors, I was asked again if i was sure that I wanted a termination and I said YES and didn't feel bad at all.

So what i am trying to say is trust your instincts, there may be times that you might think that you could have chosen a different route, but if you do continue with your pregnancy, you will always love your kid, regrets or not!

I have been rambling! Your question was how was the first 6 months, for me absolute bloody hell, didn't connect with baby, had nowhere to live (was in B&B) and no money, lost all confidence and had no support. Ha ha, well you did ask! :lol: (Please see that that hell didn't last though!!) :lol:

Hi T... when I fell pregnant with my daughter I was also in college and had just started doing my A-levels. I just about still with her dad and to be honest I didn't want to keep her, but the long and short of it is that I did. So I had her in the x-mas holidays.. boxing day to be exact, took 2 months out of college and then went back. Luckily I had some very understanding tutors how helped me through. I was even allowed to bring her into one of my classes a week. Her dad wasn't working at the time so he was able to look after her while I was at college and my mum helped to. So in the end I finished my A-levels and I did a couple other courses after that too!!

The whole thing was very difficult though I must admit. Sometimes I wonder if it was because I was so young I had the energy to get through it. Not having any money was never any fun but because I had a child I think that made work harder and push on through some of the toughest times ever. 10 yrs on and now I have a 18mth son still single and I'm planning to start a degree in September (God willing). I'm not sure I'd be so determined if I didn't have any children to provide for and try to be a great role model for them either.

I wish you all the luck in the world in finishing your studies and getting work.... oh and CONGRATULATIONS!!