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When eldest failed most of his GCSEs - generally Ds and Es (he is capable of better, for some this would be brilliant, I know) - The Git said 'well done son, you've not failed any'. It was me running around like a blue a***ed fly (I put the stars in 
) trying to find colleg places, plead with the school for re-sits etc. The Git, in my view point undermined all that.
When eldest got his certificate last year for achieving A* last year, The Git didn't say a word.
My daughter has just gained 10 GCSEs, all C and above, and has had a £15 itunes card. Eldest who yes, did well in Art, got himself kicked out of school as he couldn't be bothered opening a book has had.... a £15 itune card.
I've had to spend £97 on uniform, £30 on shoes, and I gave her £10 to go to the cinema.
In my books, the eldest should not have had reward. He should have had a good b******ing (me again with stars ). Absolutely no consistency in parenting at all. At least my mother-in-law is in the same frame of mind as me.
To be fair, I think The Gittess has done this, as it's her writing on the envelopes. The idea is brilliant for daughter - but for son...
I've blown up this morning after seeing the itunes card on the table for him. He's been told to put his shredded quilt into bin bags all hoiidays and to sort out his clothes. He hadn't. So at 8am this morning he was woken up.
I'm going up to check now, to see what has gone on.
Running around yesterday, so he could get his application into College. Why am I doing this? Even my children walk all over me.
I needed not to work yesterday, as we had to bury our dog. I was asked to go and send an email when I was passing - yes, ended up doing telephone messages and phoning people back to. As I said to him, I'm entitled to leave too...
god help me, but I'm so fed up at the moment, I really am. I need some support and help from somewhere, and the only way I can get it is if I pay someone.
Having just forked out for daughter's uniform, it won't be any time soon.
So much to be grateful for, I know. Just hard going at the mo.
Loads of hugs to you all.
xxxx
How annoying sparkling lime 
I know exactly what you mean, this totally undermines you. Thank heavens The Grand Departure is soon. People have different value systems, that's all. My boys have both had their birthdays this week as you know. Eldest got a phone call from paternal grandparents but they didn't bother to phone the youngest. Eldest is "clever" and at Uni so he gets financial help. Youngest will never get to Uni so he won't. I have told him to drop loads of hints when he is there visiting next week, though.
You sound fed up with just about everybody and everything at the moment 
Scooby Doo eat your heart out!
I agree with alison re your 18 year old, he is an adult now and whilst understandably you are sorting out the application form (I would do the same because it is important he tries to get a college place), I wouldn't be paying for things or ferrying him around until he pulls his weight. There again, you know I am a right dragon 
Thank you both.
18 year old told me yesterday that he needed another pair of trousers for work... I asked him what he thought his wages were for. I also told him that I won't be buying another thing for him if he doesn't get into college. He took it well.
As for The Git doing this as a hard luck thing, no. Both the envelopes have the same message on.
I did take him to work yesterday (normally he takes the bus during the week) as he'd been burying the dog. Clay soil and rocks. He had to have a shower.
He's sorted his bed out, and said how nice it looked.
He's lovely really. I'm just taking out my anger for The Git on him. And I know I am...
Yes, some of your anger is at "the other parent". But you also DO want your boy to get sorted out and he has responded to that, good for you and good for him! 
Hi Sparkling, hope you're feeling less fed up today. It's been another rough couple of days for you, with Ben and everything, and I'm not surprised you're feeling as you are. Sometimes our anger is because of the 'other parent'. I think we're all guilty of that one!
I know you're also feeling a bit down, as it is the end of the holidays. I'm feeling that way too. We'll soon get back into the routine though, and then October hols will soon be on us!
Hope it's peaceful for you today.
Hi Sparkling. I know you're totally fed up (well done on the stars)
Yes, your daughter deserved a reward for her hard work, and maybe the Git gave your son a 'reward' as in 'bad luck son' sort of thing. If this is the case, then I feel your daughter should have had more, not the same as your son.
As for your son not doing what you have asked him to do. He is 18, and I'm sorry, but I wouldn't give him lifts, pay for driving lessons, nothing, until he started doing something in return for you. He is well old enough.
Running around, re the application. You're doing this, because you want to see your son do well, and hopefully get a place
I think all parents think their kids walk all over them, (I remember my Mum saying it about all of us)!
As for work, you haven't had time off yet have you? Tell your friends that you need a break, you deserve it, and they should also realise this. Once the kids go back to school, have some time for yourself, without having to do anything for them, (through the day I mean)
What support and help is it that you'd have to pay for?
Have a 'you' day today, no running around after any of them
Sending you lots of hugs and energy!!
x