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If I am in receipt of benefits, and am classed as a carer (and, after the last few months, I've been reminded why I'm a carer).
Should I tell myself to pull myself together and stop feeling guilty as I am on benefits?
Working very part time, and then volunteering...
But, does scouts count as sort of "good" volunteering? With the youth club, is that also "good" volunteering? It is also a way of being there for my 14 year old too...
does this sort of mean I don't need to feel quite as guilty as I do?
I was watching question time yesterday evening, and one of the panel made me feel so much better about things. Just I'm not sure if I should
Hi Sparklinglime,
You should not feel guilty for claiming benefits, though the system is not perfect I am proud that I live in a country where we support people during tough periods of thier lives, claiming benefits should not come with an automatic sense of shame, you are doing the admirable job of raising your four children alone!
And what volunteering is bad volunteering? Yes it might benefit your son to have you there at Scouts but it also benefits all the other children, thier parents, families and the wider community! If the 'youth of today' are busy roaming the streets then you are busy keeping them occupied and teaching them skills they will use for thier entire lives.
You should be so proud of yourself
HelenT
Ooh I think our posts crossed there, Helen T. Good to know we are both thinking along the same lines
I think with the Scouting that some people see this as an upper class thing, where as I always figured with my lot it would give them opportunities to do things I never did (they had 'proper' leaders then, mind!!).
This chap on question time - and when I have a minute, I will look up his name, but he didn't run people down who are in receipt of benefits. It was refreshing to hear someone say that everyone's circumstances are different. It make me think of me.
And thank you.
Are you blushing? 
Hi Sparklinglime,
No need to feel guilty! I have recently started to get into voluntary work too,(as I mentioned in my intro) I find I get a sense of satisfaction in knowing that I am helping others, I am pretty sure you may have sensed that yourself when you work and help out too,and I note that you are raising four children, It is a job and a half raising any child/children on your own,but that has its own little rewards too it might be little things too like when my son who is 5 years old looks at me and says" Mum I really love you" or when they just look at you and smile, I know then that I am doing OK lol it gives me a kind of lift, and the hugs help also. You keep your chin up sparklinglime and keep doing what you do well, raising your children and helping out. I find it always helps to tell myself my situation is temporary,when our children are older then it will be our time to do what we wish but as for now our little soldiers/soldierettes need us and I will raise mine as best as I can and if that means doing it alone for more years to come then so be it, even if it is on benefits,we know people end up raising children on benefits for all sorts of reasons,people who frown upon us are just ignorant or uneducated and certainly lack understanding, we should not feel guilty about doing something that we were naturally put on this earth to do.............evolve.
Thats my way of looking at it anyway
yes, I am, and actually starting to feel a bit less bad (if that makes sense), and then worrying as when I feel less bad I think I'm heading for a fall...
Been sorting out grant applications and fire extinguishers this even.
The friend that's pushing it has put the new lock on the Scout hut door. Guess he knows he pushed things last night...
That's good sparkling lime!
Hello WSP, thanks for those wise words. You're right: it is a temporary thing and doing the very best we can is really important. The voluntary work you and sparkling lime talk about show very clear contributions to the community and we should all feel proud and not guilty!
Excellent post WSP 
Sparklinglime
Like you, I also get benefits and feel guilty about it. Both my children get DLA for their health problems, and I claim carers allowance for one of them and Child Tax Credit. I also work 15 hours per week, luckily in a school, so I am always there for my children. However, my ex and his new partner like to make me feel guilty, saying that I should get a full-time job, then I would better be able to afford to buy him out now. If I got a job with more hours, I would lose my carers allowance so probably wouldn't be a whole lot better off, and would probably end up taking loads of time off for the many hospital appointments my children have, and the times when they are unable to go to school. Do I feel guilty that I am therefore unwilling to work more hours? Yes I do, but right now I have to think about whats best for my children. When they are a little bit older, then I will reconsider the situation.
We do what we have to do, and shouldn't feel bad about it.
Well said, nut cutlet!
So true nut cutlet.
I work a few hours a week, but can do bits from home too. They can be demanding with my time though! But they're good friends, so it's hard to say no...
Yes, I think you should feel good about yourself
and ditch the mantle of guilt.
You are caring for four children alone. You have a disability yourself and one of your children has special needs. You work part time. You volunteer for Scouts and the youth work and you have been studying with the OU. You have lots of dreams for the future and here at One Space you use your life experience to help other people along the way. Erm...that's a pretty full schedule!
As for "good" and "bad" volunteering, could you define what the "bad" might be? Even people who only do things in the community to get their child into, say, a church school are still doing good things in the community. So what if your own child benefits? So do lots of other children and I do not notice most of their parents throwing in their contributions.
(gets trumpet out....) FANFARE!!!