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Hi, I am 11 weeks pregnant with my 4th baby. I had a brief fling this summer and despite using contraception found myself pregnant. When I told the dad he wasn't impressed and hasn't said whether he'd like to be involved or not. I have no romantic feelings towards him at all but ideally would like him to have a part in the baby's life. He's said that he doesn't know if the baby is his considering we only slept together on two occasions (although I'm sure he knows it is). I'm not really sure how to deal with this situation. I'm not really stressed about it because as soon as I got pregnant I didn't allow myself to expect anything from him in anyway. I am really poorly and would like advice on how to manage the house and other children whilst I'm feeling so sick and ill.
Hi isaruth. Welcome to One Space. Hopefully the morning sickness won't last for too much longer. Is it possible for friends or family to help you out, until you're feeling a bit better? How about the other children's Dad, is he involved with them? If yes, could/would he be able to help in some way.
I hope you start to feel better soon.
x
Hi isaruth
I felt so ill when I was expecting my daughter. I used to nibble on ginger biscuits! Strangely enough, I've hardly touched them since, and my daughter is 16!
All you can do is what you can manage. Do you have a slow cooker? Mine is so handy. Chuck everything and forget about it until tea time.
Are you children old enough to help?
Congratulation. But I really do hope this phase passes and you soon start to feel a bit better.
Best wishes
Hi isaruth,
Welcome to One Space. I hope you found Louise's links useful, if you still have contact with a health visitor for your other children, it might be worth asking them if they know of any local services which could offer you some support.
I always have horrible sickness when I'm pregnant...dry ryvitas have helped me a bit. Ar least at eleven weeks you know your nearing the end of the sickness stage. How are you feeling about your pregnancy,it sounds like you have quite a lot of stress at the moment? Do you have supportive friends or family? Are your older children boys or girls?
HelenT
My wife used to eat dry, very well cooked toast. I had to cook it of course : )
It made her feel better.
hi isaruth,
very sorry to hear that you're feeling unwell. I m 4 months pregnant with my 3rd child and was feeling really sick for the first 6-8 weeks. It felt like forever but I really feel much better now.... and much more relaxed!!!!
I hope you'll feel better soon!!!!
yule
hello yule
congratulations on your pregnancy, glad you are over that awful sicky stage, I remember it well!
Hello isaruth
Welcome to One Space. I am sorry to hear you are feeling so poorly and sick. pregnancy sickness tends to peak at about Week 10 and then gradually recede so the good news is with any luck you should start to feel better in a couple of weeks. No comfort for now, of course, and I well remember that lurching feeling when I woke up. What does your GP say?Have you tried the old remedy, having something to eat before you get out of bed? You could keep some plain biscuits beside you. Do any foods help? I found lime cordial very helpful and many people swear by ginger.
How old are your other children? Who have you got locally that can help in the way of family and friends? Maye if you could ask people to rally round for a few weeks while you get stronger it would help. I was wondering if you had used Sure Start (click here) or Home Start (click here) before? Sorry for so many questions but I am just thinking of what might help you.
As for the father, you cannot force him to be involved, and if he doubts paternity it is possible to have a DNA test after the baby is born. Certainly you can claim some financial support through the CSA.
Others will be along to offer support soon, I look foward to hearing from you again