Questy

Would be nice to have time out and meet up with other dads. With or without the kids. Maybe we can arrange a camping trip or some other mad things. Its hatd to socialise with other blokes that dont know about the domesticxs and logistics of lone parenting. And the dating chalenges we face. Anyone interested and maybe we can find funding for a dads holiday or something? OR a dads exchange to lone dads groups abroad ( now thats an idea LOL )

Posted on: November 16, 2008 - 7:14pm
Anna
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi Questy

What a great idea! I will ask around and spread the word to all the lone dads I know!

Posted on: November 21, 2008 - 5:15pm

princess

Hi,

We have something like this in Edinburgh. It works very well. Its a deprived area with alot of teenage pregnancies, and they work in getting the young dads to do things with their kids, Every saturday, they organise meets. As far as I know its still going :) I was well impressed by it.
Ooops that was a bit of a wander, but I know you mean something like that ;)
Take care
J xx

Posted on: November 26, 2008 - 11:33pm

Mr man

HI it's Mr man here . Great idea to get some lone dads together . I'm from South Manchester so if there is anyone from my part of the woods , do get in touch .

Posted on: February 15, 2009 - 3:53pm

Mr man

HI to all the guy's out there .
Come on guy's , come out of the woods lol. I would love to hear from other men out there who are bringing up there kids alone . You know us men are known for not showing our feelings and not realy saying how we realy feel or how our hearts were broken. I would like to be the first to shout out , CAN YOU HEAR MY CRY ! I would like to create a place here where we can relate to each other and knowing it's ok to cry as a man . Get in touch guy's .

Posted on: February 17, 2009 - 11:43pm

Questy

We may have a lot in common mate and agree on everything you said. So lets get a pizza in town n see bout getting some more men involved. I used to live in Chorlton, but now in Hyde.But can make it to Town easily. My msn hould be on profile, Be nice to have someone to team up with for a chamge.

Posted on: February 18, 2009 - 9:45pm

Mr man

That sounds great, will get back to you to arrange a date place and time . It will be great to meet you and chat about things .

Posted on: February 19, 2009 - 7:26pm

challangerchris

Was any progress made with this?

I'm a single father of two girls, would love to be part of some sort of meet-up.

Im from Halifax, West Yorkshire and drive so i'm open to ideas.

Take care

Posted on: March 20, 2009 - 1:55pm

Questy

We havnt had the chance to speak yet, as im in the middle of setting up business, and helping a lone parent group rebrand itself. But would like an excuse to take a break. If any dads want to give me a call and we can get something sorted. Im sure my number can be passed on. I will send an email with my home number as I know people dont like to call mobiles. So now theres 3 northern Dads wanting to come out to play. But im sure we can accommodate anyone further afield. The new lone parent project up here is using skype now as a method of lone parents that cant make a meeting can still be voiced and still feel part of the group. As you all know missing one or two sessions can make it harder to go back to a group again, this way can keep things going especially if you have only a couple of people that can physically make it to a session. So how about we try a set nite for an hour or so and we can come up with something to do. Skype is free, and we can meet on mine just look up design quest. Thursday nites at 9pm would be good for me. Anyway its up to you. Ok im waffling again LOL. Just give us a bell.

Posted on: March 30, 2009 - 5:29pm

xhomedad

I live in Lancashire and would be interested if this kind of thing ever happened.

Posted on: April 20, 2009 - 8:37pm

praetorianuk

Hi my names Phil, i'm 28yrs old and ive been a single parent of my two boys for about 15mths now, Tyler is 3yrs and Theodore is 2yrs next month

Posted on: January 11, 2010 - 7:55pm

stuart
DoppleMe

Hi guys

My name is stuart and i am a single parent of three childern.

Just want to talk to other single dads see how they mange an arrange there routine.

Get in touch an lets chat.

Posted on: April 17, 2010 - 6:44pm

Paul66

Hi Stuart,

Im Paul, I have two children a son of 11 and a daughter of 7, we lost my partner to Liver cancer back in Aug 08, it has taken me some time to grieve but im now going forward with our children to rebuild are lifes.

Routine seems to work for me, up at 7am, my son is old enough to get himself ready for School, but I have to help my 7yr old daugher as she has mild hemipleghia ( Cerabal Palsey) and has a problems with buttons but can dress herself apart from that.

When their both at School i go to work from 10am till 2pm two days a week then 10am till 3 pm for a further teo days, this helps me with picking up my youngest from School, apart from the School day routine I fill their evenings with Beavers Scouts Sailing and Horse riding, just try to keep them busy.

Paul

Posted on: April 26, 2010 - 8:46pm

stuart
DoppleMe

Hello paul

Sorry to hear of your lose must of been a massive shock for you all.

Having a routine works wonders in my house to it takes a little time to get there but you do.

All mine are at the age to get themselves dressed 14 10 and 7 even though the 7yo looks like hes been dragged through a hedge backwards sometimes and is a mud maggnet.

I do enjoy rasing them so much even though as you may well know you have your good days and bad days.

My ex-wife left us to start a new life in another part of the country with a guy she met in a internet chatroom.

The children keep busy my youngest son play football for his local team.

Daughter who is 14 enjoys the local ymca on the park.

We do baking and painting at the weekends and go to the surounding parks and beach.

Do you find that you dont have much time to yourself and if you do what do you like to do to relax.

Posted on: April 28, 2010 - 4:31pm

stuart
DoppleMe

Hi guys

Just a general question to any guys out there who have had there ex-partner cheat on them and you are left with the responebility of rasing your children.

How do you then view the opposite sex and does it make you weary of any future date or partner, has your trust been shattered.

Stuart

Posted on: May 5, 2010 - 12:30pm

Bubblegum
DoppleMe

Hi Stuart.

I don't see it as a responsibility, more a privilege or a blessing, not that I'm religious or anything.

Reading between the lines, there are two things there in your post. You feel betrayed and left with a responsibility. Sorry if I am wrong but I shall continue anyway.. Betrayal ?.. get used to it... and the responsibility of children ? ..Enjoy it.

Your X partner is missing out here on watching her children grow up and develop a personality, you will be first hand to all that, watching them develop a sense of humour and make jokes and play with their minds, all that growing up..

Your X will miss all that.

Don't worry about future partners, concentrate on living your life with your children and if you happen to meat someone and they fit into that life.. lucky you and enjoy it.

Deal with the now, learn to enjoy that and then the future will happen quite nicely.

Posted on: May 15, 2010 - 9:12pm

Bubblegum
DoppleMe

and... don't let your past experiences ruin any possible new ones : )

Posted on: May 15, 2010 - 9:19pm

Louise
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Wise words from Bubblegum, including the PS. I rhink it's important not to let your past spoil your future, however I also think that many people jump into another relationship quite quickly and it's essential to give yourself some healing time.

Some of us have been reading a book called "Are you the one for me?" by Barbara de Angelis which is a self-help book for anyone who wants to delve into their emotional programming and understand why we choose the partners we choose (and why they choose us)

 

Posted on: May 16, 2010 - 9:01am

stuart
DoppleMe

hi bubblegum

Thanks for opinion an its taken on board.

But children are a responsibility its up to me to raise them as best i can they look to you to set an example.

I love the fact that i am rasing them an thankful to that they wanted to stay with me seeing at first that there mum dient want them till she was sorted.

The betrayal is for me to deal with thats why i am still single getting the pieces of my life back together.

Posted on: May 18, 2010 - 10:01pm

darrenhja

Hi stuart my ex cheated on me when i was in the Gulf in the navy in April.  Im back in England now and struggling to get a grip that i dont see my little 11 month old boy as much as id like to.  I let her keep the house and i now live in military accomidation.  So access to my son is limited especially when im in Portsmouth and their in Long eaton.  To make things worth hes now living in the house i bought.  Watching my TV sleeping on my bed and playing happy families with my son.  Im not bitter honest!

Posted on: July 13, 2010 - 2:24pm

HelenT

Hi Darren,

It sounds like you have put your child's best interests at every step of the way, the situation sounds really upsetting and its great that you are able to be so calm about it all. Can the army provide you with any legal advice regarding access etc?

HelenT

Posted on: July 13, 2010 - 9:02pm

stuart
DoppleMe

Hello darren how are you.

Yes that bit about the other partner living in your house using your things must be hard, there was no way i was going to let that happen some stranger coming along an taking the things i have worked hard for no way.

But like everything life goes on and you have your ups and downs and things like this make you think and re-asses the choices you make, makes you a stronger person your not the only one out there thats going through it m8.

Any time you need to talk leave me a message.

Stuart (all the best m8 it does get easier just a little at a time)

Posted on: July 14, 2010 - 4:43pm

swordsman55

yes would be nice to know any single dads in northampton maybe we can arrange something 

Posted on: November 29, 2011 - 7:08pm

Anna
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi swordsman55, welcome to One Space, it seems very quiet on this thread at the moment, I hope that you get a response Smile

How many children do you have?

Posted on: December 6, 2011 - 1:06pm

Brian Rowlands

I think this single dads getting together idea is a really good idea. My children are young adults now but I still value any  input from other single parents (not just dads, mums too). I live in Cornwall so there's some great places to get together down here and have a bit of fun.

Posted on: January 12, 2012 - 8:56pm

ares372

Hi All, 

been reading the stories here and they are all important as they show the tribulations we all face from different perspectives. here's my story and why im here.

I seperated from my wife three years ago,  she was much younger, we drifted apart and culminated in her cheating as she believed (wrongly) that I was having an affair. Over the last few years she has been financially bleeding me dry, I agreed to pay ahigh amount of maintainance out of a fear of not seeing my daughter , but as she is claiming all the benefits it has come to light that I am affectively paying for her lifestyle. 

Ive also discovered that by law, although I am named on teh birth certificate, and we were married when my little one was born, I am affectively invisible in every other way, shape and form, except as a cash machine. yes I know I have rights for access but other than that nothing else. no financial assistance, no legal aid, nothing.

Due to a change in circumstances, and the fact that I am up North alone (family are based down South) she knows she can threaten to withhold access and I will be scared to do/say anything in case she is right, but my daughter is very bright, and due to spending more time at her grans than with her mum, she has been more vocal about not wanting to stay at her mums, and she is only three years old!

So what do I do? Push for custody and be what i didnt want to be, the Dad that went legal. Or play my ex wifes game? She has even split me and a new girlfriend up because she didnt like that we were so close!! two years down the pan there!!

 

Thoughts would be appreciated. 

Posted on: May 11, 2012 - 1:54pm

Anna
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi ares372, I have just commented on your other thread. You really need to seek legal advice to know where you stand.

You know that you don't want to play any games, it sounds as though you want the best for your daughter and hopefully your ex wants the same.

Unfortunately a lot of people have to go down the legal route, so you wouldn't be alone.

Posted on: May 11, 2012 - 4:02pm

Natural Mystic

I'm with Bubblegum on the dating thing Stuart.  I am a single (working) mum of an 11 year old boy and I haven't done the dating thing for several years now.  Moreso because i haven't found the time, and that i don't want my son getting attached to someone and being hurt.  I say this because he already has a father who has abandoned him/takes no interest.  What will be will be, but yes of course I'd love to find someone, someone for both of us!

Posted on: November 9, 2012 - 3:57pm

Anna
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi Natural Mystic, we haven't spoken before, so welcome to One Space from me Smile

There are two types of dating I think, there is the going out, having adult company and having fun and friendship and then there is the more serious element of looking for someone to share ours and our childrens lives.

As your son becomes more independent do you think you will start dating again then?

Posted on: November 12, 2012 - 1:13pm