Hello
Up until 6 years ago I was jus a single parent. I am now a married single parent. I never realised how much I loved being a single mum until my husband moved in with me.. Now I feel agitated, miserable and lonely and hate the invasion of what was my privacy...I have now tolerated a whole year and 1 month and have managed not to thump him. or chuck him out.
No I'm still a single parent and still need the support of other parents & certain disability forums, i havn't been on the forums for over a year thinking, i can't cause i'm married!! I can't see another year of this & need to put support in place again before the big fall, He left us when he's son was only 2 months old bak in 2007 & went bak to hiz batchelor life. When he heard our son was ill he left a message for me to contact him, this was last June, he seemed more mature and wanted to be part of his sons life, so after a couple of months umming & arring i let him but only under certain conditions. Bottom line He's not a family man and that just wont do, everything he said was empty. I have booked up a mobile home for last week of holidays for us all..tiz a trial run az i'm not prepared to go abroad next year with a foot loose and fancy free guy that don't acknowledge hiz families existance.. I got a feeling he will be fishing the whole week & leaving us to it!! yet to find out.
Hi Venus666
Interestingly I have just been having a discussion about life after single parenthood with a colleague and one of the hardest things that they are encountering is the space or lack of it!
After 7 years of living on her own with her children, making all the decisions, paying all the bills it was great to have someone to share this with.
However she never gets the chance to just kick back and read anymore, with the children you can send them upstairs, or explain you need some down time etc, however with a partner around, he wants her attention once the kids are out of the way!
So, it is about finding your own space, to be you again, not a wife or a mum, just you and it is also about finding quality time with your partner/husband.
It sounds as though in your situation you are not finding him supportive, is he trying to still live the bachelor life whilst being in your home? Is this the problem? Do you trust him? Does he want to be a family man and not know how to do it? Or does he think that the grass is always greener?
Can you manage to have a discussion about your feelings without it turning into a row? Sticking to the facts of how you feel without it getting emotional?
Perhaps you could ask him what he wants to contribute to the family holiday? I am also wondering as you have done it on your own for so long, does he find it hard to slot in? Are you still controlling finances, mealtimes, holidays?
Not at all i backed down so there was room for him to learn the ropes. He didn't want to know, jus stayed in the Garden or went fishing. He said we would go out together & he'll invite me in2 hiz world at the bikers pub, that he kept away from me. He still goes alone. I have been in tears stating that i can't go on without any feed back. he told me i'm paranoid and if divorce is what i want itz up2me. With the holiday he has volunteered to Drive, but if the kidz are loud or play up then they are not allowed to go swimming. I disagreed az one of my sons has an element of Autism & the youngest is 3, so i have just purchased a twin in car Dvd system that playz a few games like Tetris. He's not happy with me. Yes i do the finances, thank god. az he brought me a Baliff to pay off from hiz last abode. I agree he doen't know how to care, take care or join in with the family. The doors have been open for over a year & still nothing. In my head I'm at the solicitors doorstep.
Yup I don't blame you 
If you have tried to talk to him, compromise and encourage him to be part of the family life, it sounds as though there is little more you can do.
You are not put on this planet to look after him, you have children that need their mum to be strong, happy and shown love (if you have a partner in your life). It sounds as though he managed to wangle his way back into your life, whilst you were at your most vulnerable with a poorly son.
Do you know of your solicitors, is there anything stopping you going down that route? If you asked him to leave, would he?
Hi Venus666
You say you are now a married single parent, do you mean that you still feel you do everything?
What have you decided to do about the relationship? Is it salvageable? Six years is a long time to be together to have suddenly thought this, how long have you been feeling this way?