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sorry to hear that things have gone wrong i have the same problem with the fence too due to teh winds il have to look at gettting that sorted in the spring . i have had the tyre troubles too and yet again today :( i did got through the loft and a good friend came to teh rescue of mending it im not techn and still have troubles with the computer but i try to get through them .
sorry that friends are not able to come to yours over christmas but you have got other plans sorted and i was thinking i should stay at home this year but friends told me that it was not wise being the first so im off to friends too
Good friends to the rescue 
it is so good to hear that some of you will not be on your own this Christmas.
Yes, thanks guys...also good to know we are feeling the same, and having similar problems too...
But looking forward to going to my friend's Mum and Dad on Christmas day...they are lovely and I've known them for about 17 years now I think...
Yes shaz, I think it's a good idea to go somewhere...I really didn't want it to just be me and my daughter, as she probably would've got really bored, and maybe wished she was with my H instead. She spending the day with him Boxing Day anyway, when I have to work...
Oh a bit more news...The Lorraine programme...is on TV on the 10th Jan, so you can see me then...
I'm so glad you're looking forward to Christmas Day.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
10th January, put it in your diaries, everyone!
Can I watch it on IPlayer or whatever it's called? Am looking forward to it Mich.
It will be ITV Player, Hazeleyes, don't know if that particular programme is on it, I was thinking of taping it!
I have 
Hi ladies...I think it is on Catch up TV...
They said they need to come today too to do some more filming...as I wasn't happy about emailing in photo's of 'us' together( the only wedding pics I gave them were of me and my God Father, so not him anyway)...Don't want it to get too personal for obvious reasons....I think I told you that he phoned me when he knew I was doing this to see what I was going to say..he actually had the cheek to say it could be very devastating and detrimental to them both...I told him I knew all about devastating...but wouldn't land them in it...bl**dy git!( See what I mean? It's always all about them!)
Heck, yes. it does all sound a bit self-orientated, but I have to smile because he must feel guilty if he thinks you have grounds to say something on TV, whoops...but as you say it is about YOU following YOUR separation, not him 
look forward to watching the show in jan xx
Well, I don't think it's guilt as such Louise( although i'd like to think it was). I think it's more a case of him being totally obsessed with her and infatuated that he doesn't want anyone to say anything bad about her...
Thanks Shaz...
Just want to wish everyone a Christmas that is at least bearable, and hope you can have a laugh or two, and if not, at least no tears...
Hugs everyone xx
Merry Christmas to you and your daughter Mich. Enjoy your day. xx
I hope you do have a good Christmas Mich. xx
Have a good time and remember: this is the start of a whole new life! 
Just popping in quickly...
Hope you all had good times...and didn't eat too much..LOL!
Well, have to say that it was actually one of the bests Christmases I've had..( I certainly didn't think I'd hear myself saying that either), as although I had made plans, I still felt very apprehensive about it all.
But I didn't have my M-I-L taking over, dropping things then blaming us...throwing every utenstil and piece of crockery I own in the sink, and making a complete mess, then arguing or being grumpy...
Instead it was peaceful, great company, wonderful dinner, and...fun!Plus I had a really good Eve and Boxing day too...
Today my daughter is going with him and her to his Mother's for a few days, so although on my own..I have arranged to see friends...
So yes, all in all today I'm feeling good...and a good day is very precious to me in all this..
I hope everyone else starts to feel better too, or at least glad now it's over...
Thinking of you all xx
Mich, that's great that you've had such a brilliant Christmas. Meeting up with friends whilst your daughter is away is a good idea, and I'm sure you'll have a lovely couple of days. Enjoy. xx
Mich, as hazeleyes says, that is great.
xxxx
Thanks hazeleyes and sparkling...( actually not heard back from my friend, about this evening), so will go with the flow...
Hope you guys are good this evening?
Glad you had a good time, sometimes these things are better than we anticipate.
Yes, very true Louise...
Oh and had the meal with my friend and chatted a long time...it was good..
Night all xx
Pleased the evening went well Mich. Any plans for today?
hi mich glad your xmas went ok i know what you mean it being the best one in a funny sort of way hugs xx
Morning all...
Well hazeleyes, I am meeting up with another friend today, and we are maybe going to The range( I'm going to see if they have some cheap cushions for my sofa to try a cozy it up a bit. Then she said she would take me to see Sherlock Holmes at the cinema...well that's the plan anyway...see how it goes...
Yes shaz, a lot less stress for sure...
How is everyone else feeling?
i have heard that film is good hope you enjoy yourself x
Yes, thanks shaz, it was very good...
Just popping in for updates...if you have catch up TV I was on Lorraine this morning( 4th) for the preview interview...still on next week on 10th as well....
I've had a couple of down days( mainly due to the weather, being indoors,emails from H, and after New Year's blues)...but nothing overwhelming...and feeling better tonight.
Working tomorrow and Friday..so will try and get back after that too....
How's everyone else?
Hi Mich, not been on for a while and have to say i watched the paul mckenna programme on lorriane and as i was watching it i was thinking wow this lady is in the same position as me and i was totally fixed on it.....wow how shocked i was when i went through reading all the previous posts and it was actually you on the programme, i am really looking forward to watching the rest of the programme and have it in my diary....:) Did you get any luck in the voluntary work, i work with the wrvs in my local hospital and i must say it has helped me a lot, i have also enrolled in college to start next week to help me get back into work. I have to admit though it is a struggle still to get motivated to do things, you seem to be doing really well, good for you....:)
watching it on catch up again.....:)
hi mich i have the date fixed to record the show as i will be at school run then , looking forward to it x glad you liked the film .hope you are feeling ok yes for us it is still early stages hugs sent xx
Ive just watched it again and i didn't reralise you had a daughter the same as me and who actually share the same name too....lol
Hi Mich
I have just been watching you on ITV Player, you and your lovely daughter are so fab, I was very proud of you and the way you explained the differences in your life since the separation, can't wait to see the programme next week
just watched on catch up - you and your daughter are amazing- you look so composed in the interviews and came across really well - i look forward to seeing the programme next week
Hi guys...
uklady43: I have a one to one interview on Wed 11th, to see if they will take me on,and what I can do for the voluntary work.I'm glad you enjoyed the programme. It was weird watchin git myself, because it's almost like watching someone else...and it did make me feel sad too a bit...I think a lot of people will be able to identify though with what I've gone through as well..
shaz: Hugs back too...xx
Louise: Thanks so much...I'm nervous about being in the studio 'Live' not sure what to expect...apparently 'Suggs' from Madness is in that day too.
lrh: Thanks...she did really well I think. I'm very proud of her( except when she's being a typical teenager with cheek lol)
(Mich is secretly practising "Welcome to the House of Fun")
hi mich just watched the clip on catch up and when paul said to you that when anybody says something nice you turned away and cried that is me i do that and still or i very quickly change the subject. i cant wait to see the rest as just watching that clip brought me to tears
I do that too shaz....anybody compliments me i turn away and always think there just being kind.....silly i know but i think i have totally lost all confidence since my split.
Receiving kindness and compliments is hard, sometimes. One thing that can help is to think about the other person. If we can't accept their compliments then it can feel like a rejection to them. Try just saying a simple "thank you" the next time you are in this situation, and that is easier than having to discuss it all., too.
I know, it was weird...and that's how it felt at the time...I think it's because our confidence is so low, and the person we have loved has rejected us, so we can't see how anyone else can be nice to us and mean it....But afterwards...I did feel better, and as I say although I still get sad or down days...the feelings aren't as overwhelming as they were so at least... copeable...I can talk about my situation now without being in floods of tears, and also accept it when someone is nice to me now too...I still listen to my CD every night on my I-Pod though.
what cd do you listen to mich?
is it the Paul McKenna cd how to mend a broken heart - i have only listened to mine a couple of times but need to do this more regularly i think!
well that's me doing some online shopping for this cd....def have to get this....might be just what i need...:)
Yes, the I can mend your broken heart cd...But I will progress onto his confidence set at a later stage...yes, I listen to it every night...
having a bad day....:( i don't know why but everytime my ex comes to pick my daughter up i get all wound up...arghhh,. I think its when i see him in new clothes and driving around in his swanky car it really gets to me and i hate feeling this way. My older daughter now lives with him and she has totally changed too, turned into a complete snob and its caused such a gap in our relationship. Infact it has caused a totally divide in my family. My older son agrees with the change in his sister too and my youngest daughter won't even look at her without them arguing, mind you they never really got in at the best of times so its nothing unsual with them two really. My daughter's b/f stayed over at our home over the xmas and slept in the spare room and my oldest daughter found out about this and told her dad, i got very abusive texts from the ex saying i was disgusting and a disgrace as a mother and he threatened me with social services, I was so hurt with my daughter more than anything for telling these tales and we not been the same since, i just can't be the same with her after it. I don't really know what i am rambling on about here but there is alot more to this story but so tired of it all.
Hi uklady43
Unfortunately people will always take up a standpoint and rather than keeping their views to themselves they will be happy to express this , no matter how hurtful ot not based on fact. I don't quite know why social services would need to be involved....after all if under age sex is the question, it would be the boyfriend that would be in the spotlight. My own take on teen sex is that if they want to do it then they will do it anyway so better to be safe and using contraception rather than in a dark alleyway with none!
As your children get older, they will se the rights of things.....I know that is not much good now but it is part of the pattern that these things take.
hi mich just watched the programme and it was lovely and your daughter is a credit to you xxx
i may try the tapping see if that helps me
Hi Mich,
watched you this morning on Lorraine and i have to say your my inspiration, to go on telly and admit to your feelings so openly takes alot of courage and i truly admire you for what you have done and you have showed woman like me who is going through the same as you that there is light at the end.....well done mich xx
p.s please keep us updated to your progress, i too like shaz going try the tapping and waiting to get my c'ds ive ordered online xx
Hi ladies...well just got back from London...It was a great experience actually. Evryone was so lovely so I felt very much at ease, and thanks so much shaz and uklady...I must say, that if it does help anyone else identify or know they are not going through these things alone, then that is a good thing.I'm still looking for that light myself too, and as I say I know this year is going to be very challenging for me, and I still get down days too..but I know it will get better, and that was the big thing for me to try and help myself and get help in another way, rather than having to take medication.I think different things work for different people, and because I have always been very interested in certain therapies, I felt it would work for me.
uklady, just read your above post...you can only do what you can do. I know how horrible it is when your kid's say something that seems against you and for them. It really is hard to get over...but all you can hope is that one day your daughter will see through him, and don't be upset by what he says, he will say anything to make you feel bad...He has shown the bad behaviour by leaving them and you as he has.Now that is disgusting and discraceful behaviour, but because he has no conscience, he won't see that at all.
hi mich and yes you done really well on tv....:)
as for my problem with my daughter, i am just sitting back and biting my tongue as they say, it don't matter what i say it would make me look bad so i don't say anything. We are speaking but i rarely see her these days and its just not the same, but i'm hoping in time we will get it back, as for the ex, ther least i see of him the better but i just wish i could go one day without him being in my thoughts, when i say thoughts i mean in a bad way not good. i seem to feel so much hatred towards him and make up silly sinarieos in my head..(not sure if that makes sense) like what i would like to say to him etc etc, he is using 2 woman at the moment to his advantage and i would love to stir it but i never would, i just hate the time i use to think about what i would like to do......just want him out my life....arghhh or my head in my case!!!!
Hi Mich
I haven't seen this weeks Lorraine, but I will do in the next few days. Well done you!
uklady43, why not write a letter to your ex and write down all those things you would like to say to him. Don't send it, just get it out of your head and onto paper. You could also write one to your daughter too. Give your daughter time, I wonder if there is anything that you could do together in a couple of months to clear the air? Take a day out?
If it wasn't okay to be sad, I would have been shot by now
Sorry to hear so many things are breaking down, or going wrong at the moment Mich. Like Sally W says, it's good that you have an alternative for Christmas.