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Hello

Mrs Tyler

Hi there.  Just found this website and thought I'd give it a go.  Separated since last June and going through the motions of divorce.  Bringing up two young children on my own - soon to be ex husband sees them at my house every Thursday night and then takes them our for four hours every Sunday.  Happy to be on my own, happy to have children but as time goes on am finding it quite lonely.

Posted on: March 12, 2011 - 9:57pm
hazeleyes
DoppleMe

Hi Mrs Tyler. Welcome along to One Space. Do you have friends and family to support you? Yes, it can be lonely being a single parent, so you're not alone there. How old are the children?  Do you get the chance to out with friends maybe in order to meet someone? It's great that the children see their Dad too. Please keep posting as others will be along either tonight or tomorrow to welcome you too.

Posted on: March 12, 2011 - 10:31pm

tiredmum
DoppleMe

Hi welcome from me tooLaughing

Posted on: March 12, 2011 - 10:50pm

sofia

Hi Mrs Tyler

Yes, it can be lonely but this website is great everyone is really supportive. How has your weekend been so far? How old are your children?

 

Posted on: March 12, 2011 - 10:59pm

Louise
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi Mrs Tyler

You are very welcome here, do let us know more about you, the others have asked some questions to get you started. There is lots of online support here and the assurance that you are not alone!

Look forward to getting to know you, you are welcome also to join us in the Chat section

Posted on: March 13, 2011 - 10:05am

Anna
Online
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hallo Mrs Tyler

It is hard raising the children alone, however you say that you are happy with the arrangements, just feeling the strain at the moment. Have a look at our article Making new friends, you may find some useful tips there that suit your circumstances.

Getting a divorce can be a lonely time and you have been through a huge emotional change, do give yourself a chance, things will move on. Are your children in school?

Posted on: March 16, 2011 - 12:10pm

Mrs Tyler

Thanks so much for all of your replies.  Has made me feel lots better!  Children are coming up for 6 yrs old in May (girl) and my son has just turned 3 in January.  Had a great weekend but if it wasn't for my mum phoning me then I wouldn't have spoken to another adult all weekend.  My parents live in the north of Scotland so no family about.  Have in-laws who are great but are not forthcoming with the help that I need.  Have lots of great friends who have seen me through a very tough time but they all have children the same age as mine, so nights out are few and far between (been out 5 times since June).  I work part-time (18.5 hrs per week) so that is like my social life.  Workmates are great and very supportive.  I filed for divorce and although it is the right thing to do, I am very resentful of my husband who has the life he wants whereas I am constantly struggling.  Have finally sorted out things financially and access wise, but at the moment I feel as if my life is on hold.  Wouldn't change the children for the world, or the circumstances for that matter, but unless you are or have been in this situation, no-one fully understands what you are going through or how you feel.  Thanks again for all of your kind words and speak soon xxxx

Posted on: March 16, 2011 - 10:38pm

tiredmum
DoppleMe

Hi, glad you had a good weekend xxx

It can be lonely cant it but as you say we wouldnt change thingsLaughing

Posted on: March 16, 2011 - 11:26pm

Louise
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi MrsTyler

Those of us on here do understand as we have been through similar times. Do have a look at the article that Anna posted for you as there are lots of helpful suggestions there. Glad things are getting sorted, there is always so much upheaval after a separation. You said your inlaws are good but not forthcoming.....they may be worried you think them pushy. You could proactively "ask" for help, I expect they are worried about losing contact with their grandchildren, and would be delighted to be involved.

Posted on: March 17, 2011 - 8:18am

Anna
Online
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi Mrs Tyler

Your message really reminded me of when my daughter was younger and at the weekends, sometimes I wouldn't talk to another adult, in fact sometimes it was for 4 or 5 days and then it would only be a brief interaction with the woman behind the post office counter!

netmums.org.uk have a Meet a Mum page, where you can find local parents to meet up with.

Also have a look at Your Local where you can find all sorts of low cost or free fun family events and/or organisations in your area, could be a good place to meet new people. 

What is your job?

Posted on: March 17, 2011 - 4:48pm

Mrs Tyler

Thanks guys for all your advice!  My cousin came down from Scotland last week and it was so lovely to have another adult to talk to!!  I did telephone my mum-in-law and she came to babysit so I got out for about three hours - and did I feel the better of it.  Have now decided that I will call her once a month and then see who wants to come out for a couple of drinks or go for a meal.  Might as well take the bull by the horns!  Am also thinking of taking the two children to London for a couple of nights in the easter.  Have got my family and friends railcard and you get mega reductions!  As I'm epileptic I also found out that Im eligible for a bus pass.  It's great as the children love the bus and it's now free!!  No stopping me is there!  Speak to you all soon - hope you are all well and happy! xxxx

Posted on: March 27, 2011 - 8:36pm

sparklinglime
DoppleMe

Hi Mrs Tyler

That all sounds really good.  Glad your mother-in-law came to babysit.  My in-laws (rarely call them ex - and they still call me daughter-in-law!) have been great with me over the years, and the children love seeing them.

I never had the courage to take my four to London - I did Dublin once, and I think I terrified myself too much hahahaha!  I'm sure you'll have a fantastic time.

You take care.

Posted on: March 27, 2011 - 8:40pm

Louise
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

That's great news Mrs Tyler, it is hard to get the ball rolling but you have already found it pays dividends. Hope you will have a fab break in London Laughing

Posted on: March 28, 2011 - 8:01am

Anna
Online
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi Mrs Tyler, its great to read that you are being pro-active and feeling that you have a little bit of freedom for yourself and taking control of what your future holds! Laughing

SOOO, what do you want to do in London? Anything in particluar? The tourist sites, or something a bit more of the beaten track?

Posted on: March 28, 2011 - 11:32am