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hi angry, im same i just wana move on with my life but i av court hangin over me so cant,my ex same he delayed by 5 half months, and he used a hair dye,so he as to do another drug hair strand test but for last 6t months instead of 3 months, next hearin june 21st,i cant even get a job til court over with cos il lose my legal aid, we are goin thru same thing hunx
hi,
Tried to get hold of rights of women cause he has text me today saying he is collecting her from school next wed to take her out, it's not his week as court order states and i told him that, he is refusing and says he is collecting her. what is the point of court orders if he can do this? also i have a phobited steps so if he does i'm calling the police. Am i right?
Hello angrybitterandtwisted,
If your ex goes ahead with the action he has suggested he is going against a court order and I am pretty sure that this is actionable.
I hope you manage to get hold of Rights of Women tomorrow. if you can't,could you contact your solicitor and ask their advice (I appreciate this might cost you money you don't have) - or even your social worker? I know what it's like to worry and fret over the weekend because I haven't been able to get the information I needed before the relevant office closed for the weekend.
hi angry how are u hun, these men thinkin they can do exactly wot they want, he is goin against the court order, as he txt u sayin he is pickin er up or rang u, av u proof opf what he is sayin x
Hi Kiera,
Yes he text so i have them, hope your ok, just need to chill out, the more he does the more he's digging a bag hole, hope he digs it deep then i can push him in it!!! lol
wont it be fun when all this is over think we'll be so releived and happy we throw a big party!!!
it will be weird we wont know what to do with ourselves
abt xx
Hi abt, it is initially weird, but trust me, you do get used to it! I'm sure kiera can vouch for that!?
Have you contacted the police to let them know he is planning to break the prohibited steps order?
hi, went to court, it was worse than ever, crying most of the day, guardian has been sucked into his lies, she accused me of everything he has said, such as he's been telling her to say i smack her, and i'm violent, bad mother etc. he's using parentialisation i'm not an expert but looked it up and that's what he's doing and he's also a naccasist. and the judge listened to her and he said we were both very bad parents and our hate of each other is emotionally abusing our child and if we continue he will reccommend care proceedings.
one of the things that happened is why i know he is not right is: out of the blue she told me 'mum i have to do what daddy says otherwise he will kill me by stabbing a pole through my heart and i asked if she is frightened of him and she said yes
is this her imagination or underlying worries thats how she feels? i told her she must tell the guardian as thats what shes there for to protect her
and when i told the guardian this, she turned it arround and said that i should be protecting her, how can i? he has parential rights i can't stop him what ever he says and contact, she don't make sence, i thought thats her job and what can i say? i say what i think is the best
at court he showed no sign of upset or emotions just a slight smirk and i was crying my eyes out especially when he said this is one of the worsy emotional abuse cases and he remembered because she had told social mum and dad fight and it goes round and round in my tummy. that was when we split over a year ago and she has moved on since then she has toughened up and has said things like: oh daddys just lying and shes told him ' do you want to take that up with mummy?
i will have to think and be very carefull what i say to her and if she hears me, but i don't slag him off and tell her it's good that she enjoys his company
the guardian told me to get a solicitor and she said were back to court in a month for hearing of facts and she wants to get a psycholigst expert so do you think thats a good idea?
meanwhile i will reinstate my solicitor and gather evidence and do a professional statement
hi hun how are u, i new ur hearin was end april, these men, judge said to me and my ex we are both 1 step from care procedings if we cari on way we are, as in keep contactin each other, tht scared me so tht was it i never txt him again,yes u need a soliicter hun, wot bout legal aid,its just not right is it, avnt we bin thru enuff, court is hard as it is, i was very anxious bfore court, my ex just as big mouth in court, hope ur ok, message me bkx
Hello abt, what a nightmare for you.
In my view, a child would be unlikely to make up that thing about being stabbed with a pole unless something has been said.
It feels as if you no longer trust the guardian and I am not surprised about that, you do indeed need a solicitor but as you know the legal aid system has changed so you need to look into that.
As for a psychologist, it is to be hoped that they would work with the CHILD rather than believing what her dad is saying so that could be a good thing. Parental alienation is hard to prove and it does tend to be directed against the parent without care, rather than the one the child lives with (you) Were you given any guidance about who the court would find acceptable as a psychologist to do the report?
I totally get what you mean about protecting your daughter. You do indeed have a duty to protect her and are trying to do so but it feels as if the system is working against you
hi Louise
Even more complications and i am really worried not sure what to do. something has happened that makes me look even worse as a parent and social really thinking about care proceedings, if they did can i still fight for her return? along with some past issues on my side: past ss involvement when my boys were young, the car incident when i left him, a freind that stole my laptop and childs nintendo toy last year now i have another problem a freind i trusted and helped (i allowed her to store her stuff in my cellar) has come round to collect some her items but has given abuse and threatened my daughter saying she will be back to cut her finger off and cut her throut, then she smashed door window, stole my laptop whist collecting more items, re-smashed more of the glass next early hours. i have aggreed at the first incident daughter stays at her dads house whilst i clear this womens items, i report everything to police, contacted her dad and were talking amicabily.
do i pay the solicitors and still go to court and what can i say about made a bad choice of freinds last year and still aim for her residence to stay with me with strict contact orders or do i work amicabily with her dad getting social off our backs and see a solicitor both sign an agreement of contact issues ect. then later if he doesnt stick to it go back to court. not sure what to do i would like to work amicabily but can't trust him but i know its not looking good for me at court. the judge is listening to guardian and saying were to stop our fighting (but i am not, soon as i say my concerns they just think it's anamosity) social are bullying me.
so many thought going through my head sick with worrie, may not even be able to get a solicitor depending on how much money and court is end of may
Help?
abt xx
Hi abt this all sounds really stressful so i can understand your worry, i am sure that we have all had a friend that turned out to be rather dubious, we can't control what others do or say, we just have to manage with what comes along and it sounds like this is what you have done you have protected your daughter by sending her to her dads.
Did you manage to talk with your daughter about this womans threats?
I hope that you have managed to remove this womens belongings so as to avoid anything like this happening again, you can contact our Legal Expert if you have some questions that you need answering, you can also contact the Family Rights Group they support family's that have social service involvement.
Do you have a support worker or anyone that is supporting you?
I know it is easier said than done but try not to worry to much
hi hun how are u, just read ur post, so cos u was involved in bad people it cud go against u, is tht right, yes but u are not involved in bed people anymore are u,u are trying ur best,wot do they want blood,court is end of may, can u afford a soliociter, i no i cudnt, i stil av my legal aid, cant even get job or move on propa cos i dont want lose my legal aid, my court hearin is june 21st, i avnt heard off my solicter or cafacss since feb, altho in way im glad, wots ur next step hunx
It's impossible i can't re-instate legal aid even if i pay outstanding £600 i can't prove my self employment as accountant hasn't done my tax yet, they need that information and then i would be recalculated and they take so long, last time i sent them every paperwork i had but still want more and it wont get sort before end of this month. whatever i do i'm up against a brick wall and not getting any help from anyone
Have you been in touch with Family Rights Group as Sally suggested ABT? They will be able to help, ie giving you some advice on the best way to move forward with this.
They even have a discussion board like ours, but who have similar experiences to your self.
Please let us know what they say.
hi angry how are u,wots bin appening,x
hi angry how are u, really ope ur ok, reply soonx
Hi Kiera
Having a really bad time and don't know what to do, been trying to get a solicitor got to see one tommorrow for a financial accessment. meanwhile social say she told school she hates me and i smack her all the time and she wants to live with daddy he is taking her everywhere and buying her expensive presents, now social are saying they want to go for care proceedings and she's still at her dads, court order states that social check that i have removed womens belongings and i have her back but he says can't because police women beleives daughter when she says i been smacking her. I told x i dont want her taken and he says its wrong and he will take social to the papers, he says their playing us and want us to argue, i'm really confused
social said they want to get care order and then investigate both of us, as he don't know whos telling the truth
what the hell do i do. Can i stop the court orders councilling them telling them i am working amacibly and stop social or do i still go ahead have a solicitor and collect her from school because there is no order she can't be with me, i have residence
my dad said he would come live with me as he don't want to see her taken, but then sister in law said they will just say i can't cope so that wont work
anyone know what i should do? i love my daughter and as far i i'm concerned he has used naccissum parentialisation and has lied to social and on statements i have only been trying to protect her from emotional abuse now i think have i been wrong? and could i ever trust this man to be amicable. I know he wants residence what if we have shared residence where she stays with him one week then with me? but what about all the s*** he tells her like i'm bad and it's all mums fault etc... i really don't know....
Oh, ABT what a terrible situation and I am not surprised you are so upset, the main thing I would suggest, which I think we have mentioned before is that you can contact the specialist support group Family Rights (click) to see if there is anything they suggest.
Good luck with the solicitor, I know that Legal Aid has changed so much that it is more difficult to obtain.
hi angry aw i really feel for u, how much more can u take, i can see u love ur daughter,these men do like, and try and manipulate, my ex same, u can never ever trust these men, again,why wud he get residence tho, x
Hi
Kiera
Might have a solicitor finding out tommorrow costs, i know exactly whats going on and it's wrong, whilst she stayed with him when i was getting womens stuff out house sw was supposed to check that i have and she is returned to me as on court order. well x has manipulated telling her she must draw picture of mum thats the bad one and say shes hitting and sending to your room then she will be living with him happy and he will take her out and buy her anything she wants. so shes done it, i didnt hit her and i never send her to her room, so sw don't beleive this could possibly happen or hes been paid by x. either way its down to sw as shes on cpp and he is allowing her to stay with x as he think i'm just making emotional abuse up to be mallicous. I'm not going to agree with leaving her with him the longer she is th more brainwashing and other excuses they can find to keep her away from me, thats it i am bloody pissed off and angry i am not having it, i dont trust him or social or anyone and judge just listens to guardian who listens to social who listens to x, i will get her back asap. even today he was a bastard, i rang to talk from a payphone asked to speak to her and said can he ring as i cant top mobile up till end month, and only got 70p in payphone he said talk to her now, i told her i see her tuesday then phone cut off, i text asking to ring me as she wont know why phone went dead, he didn't and i know he prob told her 'mum don't want to talk to you' cause thats how he is a f***kin B****rd
if can't get sw to return her i'm going to cause upraw i will tell everyone i can what happens and social workers are w*nkers i will go on the radio, tv, newspapers, stand outside courts, get crouds to raid offices
It is absolutely beyond infuriating what is happening. Good luck with the solicitor.
Did you ring the Family Rights Group?
Hi,
I have court tommorrow, but at moment she is staying with x and i have to have supervised contact at a centre
when i last saw her she didn't want me to go, she was crying and wanted to come home with me, she said x keeps promising to take her somewhere but never does
and he falls asleep and she wants to play but can't wake him up, do i tell the social thats what she said. as she said it when we got in social workers car.
i have asked for more time and they agreed i can see her once a week for 2.5 hour contact
how long will this go on for? and the longer time she's with him he will manipulate her more. they say children don't lie, well i would have thought they can easily be manipulated so i don't agree, will they just come up with other excuses as to why they can keep her from me.
my solicitor is ok but she said i need to work with them and except their help? I trust noone
abt
hi hun how are u,so u are allowed see ur child in centre, why supervised tho, i av see my soliicter tomoz and do statement, wish didnt av to go tho, z
hi hun let me no how court went ok thinkin of ux
Good luck with court, ABT.
Yes I do think you need to mention to social services any negative things she says about her time with her dad. Try and do this calmly (difficult!) and in terms of "this is not good for my daughter"
What did the Family Rights Group say when you phoned them?
good luck today hun, il message u laterxxx b strongx
Hi Kiera and others
Very very happy, went really good at court, got a solicitor, when judge asked him what e wants for the future he said i want to have sole residence and me supervised visit and i tried not to laugh and the judge was not amused and he asked if he would answer his question (the judge added ''this is about a child that has 2 parents, when is she going to see her mother?') x didn't know what to say and our childs soicitor said to x 'who are you to throw allegations when you have a health and alcohol problem and haven't seen her in 2 months? after court x asked my solicitor if she was a volantee and she told him no this is her job and she charges by the hour!!! x had also tried to recommend his own phycologist and they were not having that. think they realise now whats going on and end of the day she not going into care and he is not getting sole custody!!!! what a reasult!!! i'm happy
hi hun aw very pleased for u, wot a result, xx
Hi abt that is great news i'm so glad that everything went well 
Do you have to have any more court hearings or is it all decided? Do you have any plans for the long weekend?
Crying every day, i missing my baby i want her home, 3 months is too long and worrie i won't ever get her back, shes happy playing with new freinds at his and i only get to see her once a week supervised. been thinking about moving but its complicated. would be able to tell courts i moved to get a small warmer flat, away from troubled area, would like near the seaside cause its cheaper, nice places and healthier and she like the seaside, have lots problems with this house its too big cant afford to heat it it's cold draughty damp problems, bad area bad people, can't even open shop cause of the trouble, wanted it to work cause of stability and her school, i could sell everything like all the shop stuff and stock and furniture and use the money for the move, and when i get deposit £1,000 use that to buy what we need, but i have to be available for these phycologist sessions and contact with her. and would they say it's a good thing or a bad. don't even know where i am financially could have a mountain of debts by time september comes. head spinning how s**t can life get? help someone please
forgot to say we have to have phycologist to talk to each of us and then final hearing in september that when they will say where she will be living with us shared or him or me or in care
oh well another 3 months of absolute hell!!!
Hi abt, on Friday you were feeling very happy at the outcome of the court hearing, you realised that it is probable that your daughter won't be going into care and your ex won't get sole custody.
September can seem like a long time away, but it will come all in good time. It sounds as though you want to make some changes to your living arrangements and I am sure that this can only be a good thing for you and your daughter.
Have you rang the Family Rights Group (click) on 0808 801 0366 to see if they have any suggestions about your situation?
i keep trying the FRG but never get through.
He texting me now telling me i spent her money, what happened was a few weeks ago i asked him to get a school shirt and he said if he cant get one he will give the money. then she come home with an asdas card that had £16 on it. i told her we haven't got an asda but soon as i go near one i could get her shirts. now he is saying i spent her money and he's been telling her to get the card back. i text saying i'm sorry about the missunderstanding and i have a receipt for the asdas clothes but he keeps texting tell me i have spent her money (in otherwords i'm bad) he will prob tell her i'm bad and spent it
social don't make any sence they say were not to argue, but we need to work together for her sake, soon as i communicate he just uses it against me, i don't know how to handle him, it's not a simple as just let each other know about contact times
It doesn't sound easy abt, it seems as though everything you try and do, gets twisted by your ex, this is abusive behaviour, are you in touch with your local womens centre? Perhaps find a Freedom Programme?
From your message I am presuming that you bought the school shirts from Asda as your ex requested. You will then have the shirts and your daughter will know this. Are you able to give the shirts to your daughter next time you see her?
There is no easy way to handle your ex, as it sounds as though he will make things difficult regardless, I would suggest that you try and do everything to the best of your ability and anything he says, let it slide. The courts and social workers will see what is going on. Do you keep a diary of these sort of interactions?
Yes everything twisted, i have been on the freedom program but doesn't teach you how to handle this nutter that causes trouble on a daily basis and he has parential rights, and the whole system takes too long and it's difficult to gather proof, i gave the shirts to my girl when i saw her last week, he said they haven't come from asda
yes he just winds me up. i just got to allow him to dig his own grave, i am going to show text to social and explain i try and do the right thing and he is delibrately doing this.
Like today i went to see her at contact centre and i had been told i can see her tommorrow so i told her i would see her and we hugged kissed then on her way out they said he had counciled tomorrows contact so i was crying and she saw me, i did talk on the phone, and i asked them he could do this again. she was still upset he said she wanted to come home with me, it breaks my heart 3 months is a long time everyday i'm crying for my baby. he's going to continue to manipulate her and she wil get used to living with him
my solicitor is good though, i send her a recording and she said we can use that as evidence and the lady and man at the contact centre know whats going on and they were very supportive.
so the sh*t is hitting the fan but very slowly
xxx
So can he just cancel the contact without offering an alternative? My heart goes out to you, no wonder you are upset, the randomness of it all is very unsettling.
Sorry to hear you can't get through to the FRG, I would suggest calling first thing in the morning, the Helpline opens at 9.30am each day. Also if you look at the section on their Home Page entitled Advice Service, there is email advice and some helpsheets.
Glad you have a good solicitor, ABT, you need to surround yourself with people who can give you that support...and you also need to look after yourself right now as this is such a rollercoaster of a time and you want to be in the best shape emotionally that you can, ready for September.
Dear Lousie
At court the judge had said there is no reason for me to be supervised and i should be able to use the contact centre as a drop off point. so surely that mean i can? my solicitor said it's up to the social worker, surely if thats what a judge has said his word should mean something. i'm going to the contact centre tommorrow but i know my social worker is not there, i will ask them thats what i want to do and if they don't beleive me they can ring the judge?
also it was the guardian that said we could all have a physcolgist assessment do you think she wants to try get proof of the emotional abuse as i told her he is using parential alienation. or is it to see if we can parent and what help we need? and do you think the psycologist will see the parential alienation is happening? as x is not worried about the assessments and our girl may not say a thing as he constantly has told her not to mention certain things and she only says what he wants her to. if this assement are not looking for it they wont find it will they? then i will look even worse
abt xx
hiya hun how are u, u are getin see ur litle girl at the centre then, my hearin june 21st, hopein last one, my soliciter said if he fails this drug test then she wil say in court for case to b dismissed,cos i want it over with and i cant move on til it is, xx
Hi abt, it could be that the social worker needs to sort the arrangements for you to be able to have unsupervised access, as for the psychological assessments they do these for numerous reasons and that can include assessing parenting capabilities, they are trained to pick up on any manipulation that is going on.
hi,
ok thanks well social worker not back till 6th so that mucks up this week, ok hope they do pick up on it then, do they see my girl once or few times?
thanks
abt
ooops double post
Hello Sorry I have not read this whole thread however something sprung up to me in this reply i read you say
You don't want to go counselling due to the fear of being told that you are emotionally unstable?
I am on prescribed anti deppressants and I received counseling on numerous occasions and in my court paper work it was viewed in a positive light that I would be open about it and her care didnt suffer.
I also disclosed to the court this court case was effecting my mental health and the whole procedures got dismissed and thrown out of court.
Every case is different, However I had a section 37 report and it stated there was a abusive partner with a different name on police records and I just explained it was dumb but i was protecting him and feared what the local authority may do.
I find that having been through this process, the more friends you have on your side the better.
If every social worker is saying great things about from school to the school nurse I even voluntarily engage my daughter in emotion support classes due to her life experiences and it was seen as positive.
You really do have to woo the pants of them and not give them ANY cause of concern. also you have to be very rational and you can't just say i dont him to see my child.
What i did was tell the truth, and said that every child needs a mother and father HOWEVER i would like for my child to have a positive relationship with her father and to live a life free from domestic abuse. etc etc etc etc.
Not just say he did this or he did that .
for example i said him and his family is derogatory towards my child and it has effected her confidence and self esteem You have to give examples and state the effect.
I don't know your whole case however I think he is playing mental games with you.
Social services want you to be a good parents
And my ex did the same try and create situations to goat me to act irration then he would act all sweet and innocent.
DONT FALL FOR IT!
Get him out your life and focuss on your kids being with you and PROVE why you should be in their lives.
Dear Shockedmum
No i am not worried about having assements what i was saying is will they find out he is using emotional abuse and brainwashing our child?
she had emotional therapy at school but after being with her dad for 1 week she told them that i had hit her and she hates me and wants to live with dad, she done drawings, same kind drawing were on his statement and she was fine before she went. they asked her several times if she wanted to stay with me and she said yes. we are very close and i know she loves me and she says she wants to come back home,
Yes he plays mind games but how can i get away from him, it's almost impossible because he wants sole residence and court is in september. all year he has been teling her to say i'm bad and hit her and she will live with him, he says things like ''his sisters will buy her loads of presents if she chooses him but if she don't she wont get any'' then he tells social and courts loads of lies about me, he told them i'm violent, harrass him, have a boyfreind and kiss in front of her, that a freind come to my house with a knife, that my property is not secure, even said my mum kicked her. and social worker just says he don't know who to beleive. all lies none of it is true, when i am accused of these i feel as i have to defend myself and tell them i haven't otherwise it will look as though it is true.
as same time as soon as i say if i am concerned about something such as he is drunk then they just think i'm fighting with him or trying to make him look bad which i am not the difference is he lies i don't. but when i am concerned for her wellbeing i have to tell them that because i am
it has been this way for 1.1/2 years and i have always been concerned about the emotional effect he does to her and also his drinking and health problems and he takes her to his workplace which is no place for a young child, its a dusty with tubs of acid and lorries in and out and he just tells them she stays in his office well it's rubbish his office is in the middle and wont she get bored? still near him when he is weilding. it's ridiculas if something happens then it will be socials fault because i have been trying to tell them all year and they don't seem bothered they think the sun shines out his backside. but they don't know him, do they really think it's all in my head? they really annoy me they put her on a child protection for emotional abuse saying shes cought up in the middle yet they have allowed her to stay with a emotional abusive liar. and why are they listening to a liar anyway?
They couldn't see the truth if it come and bit them on their arse Pathetic
when i asked social he said he beleives what she said and he don't beleive x could be emotionally abusive.
how can i prove whats going on?
how can i get away from him?, i can't as he has parential rights
abt xx
First things first Have they done a fact finding mission?
You can state your case, do not worry or take in what they have said or what your daughter is saying.
What you do is focuss on you and WHY your daughter has said this.
There is nothing really you can do other then articulate yourself in court speak to social workers and who ever is gathering evidence to present your case.
You have to tell them what he is doing and why it is dangerous.
and how it has effected her
Don't let him enter your thoughts.
Gather evidence and write everything he has ever done even if it was a little pinch.
and articulate how this is a detriment to the child
Don't let him have power over how you feel.
I personally went to refuges with womens aid. however I don't know how you'll get away from this. I think you first have to get your child back. and also remember when you see your child, have the most brilliant time EVER, do whatever she wants and smile and make it a time to remember.
As stressing over this and what he has indoctrinated her with will not help you.
Keep all that frusteration for the report and if you play it right she may just say it was her dad telling her to say these things and you said she already has then have the confidence to know that EVERYTHING gets written down in these reports social services are your friends even if you hate them grin and bare it.
My social worker was an ABSOLUTE TWAT. but she in the end she was only doing her job and wrote down what she thought after interrigating me like i was a criminal it went in my favour she analysed the evidence social workers They do dumb little things like come to your house unexpected but i welcomed them and offered them tea they must have thought my house was a tip or something since he had alleged that, i must have bought a library of books from the charity shop and starting doing homework religiously and she told the social worker and she just looked at me funny however in the report she said she was pleased lol erm she would comment on my child may be cold and i would run to get her a blankie just to show look i am her mum and my child would be like i am not even cold mum.
I also had a statements from womens aid, and the school, ifst, big community and the school nurse and g.p.
And thats how you prove what is going on, by stating it. the rest is just faith that the truth shall prevail
Have faith that social workers arent against you they are just doing their job and everything you say does get reported and analysed even if you think they don't believe you.
Anyways i read this thread a bit more now.
He does seem to be lying quite a bit and making allegations after allegations.
He is being a vexatious litigant.
There was a case where a mum did this to the father and her case was dismissed because the courts can see when ppl are continuously lying and trying to prelong a case.
All you have to do is state this and do research on family cases and have the confidence that court will lissen to you.
Thank you shockedmum
I will take on your advice, it's hard isn't it, i have all these feelings still upset about how he treated me when i forgave him and tried to make it work. I love my daughter with all my heart and when i see her we do have a fantastic time and lots hugs and kisses i knw shes missing me as i am her and no matter how much he is spoiling and taking her out she still wants to come home. i'm doing a diary and i am trying to gather any evidence. i pray to god truth comes out and they see whats happening but i don't trust the social and know he got round him from the beginning. i will take note of what you say though. i have also researched and found that he was a narccist psycopath with me and since seperated using parential allienation. i will look up vexatious litigant
thanks again and keep in touch as your very much appreciated
abt xx
hi angry how are u,its hard init, my ex lied and lied, he stil is,my soliciter said wud he b carryin on with the case if he didn tav legal aid, no he wudnt,these men are vile human beings,x
How come he gets legal aid? i can't cause i'm self employed but hes self employed and on incapasity benefit and i know they have made big cuts. makes me laugh he even said he is willing to pay tawards the assessments thought he didn't earn much thats why on benefits, they really take the piss why are the courts allowing them to?
very frustrating
i'm ok, have to keep strong. we have had to cope with what they done to us, then accusations and struggle to get support yet it seems like they get all the help and were the victims along with our children that we try to protect.
Thats why they get away with their evilness because people don't beleive they can be so heartless imoral a***holes
hope ur ok?
abt xx
you're welcome i know its easier said then done but try to leave all emotions for him to the side, if he cared he would want to co-parent which is another point you can bring up about parent alienations backed up by his actions and how it effects the child which is a form of emotional abuse may I add. and remember the final judgement does not lie with social workers if you disagree with what they say or feel they are swayed by him since narcisist are know for their charasmatic ruthless behaviour you can always contest any of their reports presented to the court, I know it is frown upon but secretly record any conversations they have with you, so if worst did came to worse you are prepared to fight it all the way.
I however dont think it would ever get to that courts are very experienced in family feuds.
Hi Kiera
I am ok, but getting very stressed out, court is ajourned until end april and it will only be a directions hearing, so still waiting for a final and feel it's stopping me getting on with my life, i can't wait till it's over but when will that be? he's had his test and mostly says negative appart from 1 part that says it's out of range and this could be medicine or binge drinking? at the end of the day he's managed to delay the test for 3 months so it's worked. i'm going to tell them he's done that and it therefore is not a true reading. i at least know what i need to do so i'm doing it, i'm changing sw to a women and preparing a bundle for court, prob get some advice from my girls solicitor and i have a makenzie freind.
Hows it going with yours?