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Hi I recently made a clain to csa in feb for my son who is now 7 months old ( he was 1 month old at point of claim ) it has took me a while to get to where I am now of my claim being put forward but today I got a call from csa asking me to ring them does anyone know what this would be as I have given every detail I knew and now I'm worried I'm not going to get any help ( struggling as it is :( ) can anyone help me in any thoughts to why they want me to ring , thanks xx
Ok thank you I just want it sorting and I know his dad isn't exactly the nicest of people and doesn't like to part with money but he helped make his son he should pay as well , I'm glad you got I yours sorted :) xx
Yes, do phone them, Dominiquedon.
Hi Dominiquedon, did you get through to the CSA? What did they want in the end?
Hi yes I did and they just wanted a contact number for my sons work but even the guy I spoke to from csa said It not my responsibility to get tht sort of information and they are sorry for the amount of time it is taking and for other not doing their jobs correctly ( which I agree with ) , thanks for asking :) hopefully it will get sorted end of this month I've waited long enough just for that extra help xx
Hey there! Thanks for letting us know. Glad you took the bull by the horns and just rang, we don't know until we ask eh?!
Hopefully you might receive a small lump sum when it starts?
Does your ex see your son?
No he doesn't see him well he has when he didn't have a gf but as soon as he has one ( this is the 4th since M been born ) he doesn't want to play dad or know him he's doesn't contact me n ask a bout his son I've not had anything through the pregnancy n after ( its shameful ) I've tried to be nice n civil to him but it comes to a stop when he chooses everything else over his son n lies to me when he doesn't realise his family talk to me and tell me what's true n what's not he gets caught out every time , I've gave him so many chances but now I don't know what to do either let him see him or cut it all together xx
That's difficult for your son, well it will become more difficult as he gets older. Children need consistency. At some stage you will need to take the bull by the horns and get something sorted but I suggest you get the money settled first before you rock the boat about his parenting time.
As first step I would get an exercise book and write down the dates he actually sees him in case you need to show a "pattern" of contact/non-contact in the future.
I don't think contact with him n my son will be a problem anymore as he lives 6 hrs away n the money he does get he spends on drink or his gf n his self , ive always said he can see him when he wants but ur right if he isn't going to be consistent then I need to sort it coz it isn't healthy for him poor guy I feel sorry for my baby n I shouldn't just wish his dad would be a dad he missing out xxx
Well it will be good when the CSA gets sorted. You can't make your ex see his son if he doesn't want to.
I am taking from your message that you are still in contact with his family?
Yea they agree with me and are ashamed how he has been towarda M and I know I can't force him but I won't let him just pop into his life when it suits him i when he has no gf or wants something from me usually money , which I don't give him then it's just abuse I get from him because I've said no he can't have anything I've just spoke to the csa and they are still trying to contact him it just seems its taking forever and I just want it sorting xxx
The wheels do turn very slowly, I agree. Try to rise above it and live your life anyway, these things will be sorted in due course
Dont be worrying and just give them a ring its probably something silly like what benefits your on, or a mistake with your address or maybe they need your bank details for payments, they are only there to help, at least you have done the right thing and contacted them to get it sorted, i have just started receiving my payments and my boys are 18 and 21, so just give them a ring so it gets your case moving quicker, it wont be anything to worry about
x