TaniaM

How hard its been being aways from the family. I moved to the UK in 2007 i was 16 years old due to problems at home with my step father, i blame my mum for everything that man done to me , ecause its her house and she knew what was going on but was always on his side, till the night in Dezember when he burned my arm with boiled water i had enough, so couple days after i told my mum that she had to choose between me and him , she didnt say anything ut then she asked me when are you leaving, so for me she made her choice.. so that when i came to the UK i was living in Cardiff with some people, everyhing was fine in the beginning but then arguments started and stuff but i had to pretend i didnt know what was going on ecause i didnt have anywhere else to go. in 2009 when i turned 18 i got tired all of what they were talking ihand my back so i told them i was leaving i thank them because at the end of the day they had me in their house. So i spoke with a friend of mine that was living in London (victoria) and she said ya course come stay with me. so i went i got myself in college (lambeth college in Vauxhall) from 9am-4pm, and also found a cleaning job so that i could help her with bills ( 5am-8am). i meant it just got to tiredring after 3 months i had to give up on something so i left the job bcoz i wanted to study, so after  that moment the indirect started till the day she told me i had to leave because i wasnt helping her out. so i said ok thats fine. i didnt know what to do i remeber i went out that night for a wlk i was just  crying and this guy saw me and came speak to me i just saw myself telling him everything, and he said to me came stay with me for as long  u want, im travelling to america the day after tomorrow im leaving u the keys you dont have to worry about anything my sister also will be in the house, for as strange as it was i agreed to go.. so when it came the day he was leaving to america for holidays he left the keys and money for me.. an amazing person.. but i was confortable so as was trying to find another solution.. thats when i got in contact with another friend of mine that was living in a hostel in east london, and after two weeks i got a room there..so i was finally starting. 

In 2010 thats when i met my daughetrs father ( thats another longggggggggg story) that ill leave for another time.. 

my princess its gona be 2 yeras old next month.

 

 

But my point was i hate being and feeling alone. my family all back home, my two nieces my nephew and sister always telling to go back but its hard because i cant take my daughet away from her dad apart from everything she deserves to have a relationship with him.

But yh ii havet seen my family since 2009 when i went there for 2 days, and my mum come here to mt my daughter last year when she turned 1..

 

Its hard but we need to be strong for our own good

 

Posted on: December 17, 2013 - 5:14pm
Sally W
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi TaniaM

It sounds like you have been through some difficult times and are coming out the other end a much stronger person. 

What do you think would help to make you feel less lonely?

Posted on: December 17, 2013 - 5:30pm

TaniaM

hey Sally

i dont really know because my battle it aint over yet still having problems with housing keep on moving me to temporary accommodations i finally received a letter saying im under considerantion for a permment place i hppy bout that, but theres arrears to be paid of £639 (it was £3200) furniture to get if i do move into this place.. i mean its hard to tell what would make feel less lonely , im only 22 years i feel that i should still wid my mum and have support from her.. im a really proud person i would never show or tell people that im lonely. i dont really have friends.. i dont know

Posted on: December 17, 2013 - 5:45pm

Louise
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Yes things are still not settled for you and so that will not be helping how you are feeling! It sounds as if the housing is the first priority to need sorting. Is there anyone in the family who could help you out with some money towards the arrears? have a look at the Shelter website (click) for some more information.

As for moving back to the States, if your daughter's father is on the birth certificate and has Parental Responsibility then you would need his permission to move.

Once you are settled in permanent accommodation, the next priority is to build yourself a network of friends. As you have a little one, there are lots of opprtunities to go to local toddler groups, the local church, exercise classes with a creche etc. Your Health Visitor and local Children's Centre will know what is on offer in your area. Your daughter will soon be old enough to qualify for some free sessions at playgroup/nursery and this will give you a chance to have a bit of "me time"

Posted on: December 18, 2013 - 8:32am

TaniaM

Hi Louise

Im not from the states im from Portugal

i have asked my mum before for some money so that i can pay the arrearsbut she couldnt send me money.so yh 

ill have a look at shelter website..

 

I just want all of this to go away 

Posted on: December 18, 2013 - 12:32pm

Sally W
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Hi TaniaM you can also write a message to our Money Expert they maybe able to suggest something that can help you. 

Posted on: December 18, 2013 - 2:51pm

Louise
Parenting specialist DoppleMe

Sorry about that, TaniaM, when I was writing my reply I was so immersed in helping you that for some reason I thought you had said USA. Do contact the money expert as Sally has suggested.

Posted on: December 19, 2013 - 8:23am