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No3 son wants new clothes. This - in principle - is fair enough; he is still growing and I suppose he can't help it.
Unfortunately, No3 son has very expensive tastes. He doesn't understand that I am unwilling to pay £ 20 for a T-shirt even though 'that's really cheap, mum, normally they're 60'. It's ok that I pay a fiver for my own t-shirts, cause I am older and 'I bet you wore more expensive things when you were my age' - Apparently, if he wears cheap(er) t-shirts (he likes the polos) everybody will make fun of him. This is a problem none of the other three have.
I have pointed out that I have to pay for the car to be fixed (still haven't rung the garage), the bath tap fixed (but, mum, why does it need to be fixed? because the water is just running through. but, mum, wouldn't it be cheaper to let it just run?), I just paid £ 72 to fill up the car, and £ 130 on shopping (why do teenagers need so much food????).
His reply is that he could just not eat lunch for a few weeks, and that would safe some money. He did not understand that his health was more important than a designer t-shirt.
What is it with him? Why is he so insecure? The others all seem to be ok in the self value department.
I'll have you all know that I am very proud of myself for not losing my temper over this, but kept calm. He went outside for a bit and came back in - he is very very frustrated.
Any ideas how I can tell him I love him and his friends will be ok with him even without designer whatever? Really big sigh 
Hi Hopeful 
I would say you are pretty lucky not to have had this with the other three!
And I would also say "stop worrying", it's not about him feeling unloved (although the things we have discussed in the past such as individual Special Time, praising and affection would do well to be there ALL the time...)
Presumably you give him some money for lunch every day? So....just give him a sandwich, he won't starve and give him a budgeted sum and let him choose what clothes to buy. It's an expensive old world out there and if he chooses designer then he can only afford a couple of things. But let him learn this for himself rather than you getting in a twizzle "Bottoms" can be quite inexpensive from sports shops by the way, and perhaps matter less to the fashione conscious so maybe you could buy him a new pair of trackies and leave him to it with his budget. And as for the size of the budget not being big enough for him, tough, you have a whole family to bring up and that's it until he has his own money.
And yes, I am proud of you too, for not losing your temper
You're not hogging the place. And well done.
The 20 year old is after clothes too. I've not bought him anything for the funeral, but did need to buy some half decent stuff for the others.
He's sulking and has been looking at Next online..!!!!!!!!!!!!
I do get stuff on ebay. While they may be second hand, until now, at least, he's been happy with that rather than not at all.
I no longer wake the older two for school/college. They get to face the consequences. I do wake the younger two though. Although youngest is still here, so I'll have to take him in... He's upset this morning.
Ah... Youngest is staying home.
Thanks for the support!
I've looked at ebay, but there is nothing along his line.
I will check my bank (scary) and see what budget he can have and tell him that.
This morning he is late for school and I had a whole conversation about how that matters and he says it doesn't and there's no point and he doesn't care anyway. So I said what, about getting into college and he said yes, but if he doesn't he's not going back to any school. So I said he'd not stay at home and he said he'd become a hobo then. grrrrrrr.
I think it made him think though, because he said he'd be as quick as he could (so the least possible late) and it was because he woke up in a bad mood. (I did loose it a bit at that comment and was sarcastic). He left in a better state though.
Where is that worry button, so I can turn it off?
This lot not getting into college bothers me too. They'd sit on the computer all day, quite happily.
Big row yesterday, as daughter was home from 11am and nothing done by the time I got home. Not impressed.
I do think this next generation will be all too happy to be at home on JSA!
I've not found my worry button yet 
I think alot of it has to do with peer pressure and hopefully it's just a stage he's going through.
Ha, that stage better end soon! It's been going on for about two years now. Maybe he's having the other three children's stage as well, huh.
All I can say Hopeful is my son is 20... Still waiting
Thanks, Sparkling! This fills me with confidence! Having the same discussion about being on time as I type. Can't be bothered with it today.
One does like to do ones best to cheer one up...
(sorry)
Just to add another recurring thing: he's supposed to start school at 9. He's still at home and will be late because he doesn't like taking the train ('his' train is packed at that time) or the bus (because it takes so long and he'd have to leave at 8 - which he does when I go there and take him).
It seems he feels the world owes him a living. I have to go in, but not till 2 today. The others don't have that problem, they go as necessary.
What will he do when his exams start next week? I am so fed up with having to make 'special arrangements' just because he won't play ball.
Any motivating ideas?
And I am sorry, I feel like I am hogging this place! :-(