hello

Hi

My name is Julie(43) and i am a single mum again! was a single parent to 3 grown up children 25yrs 23yrs and 20yrs they have all flown the nest.

I now have a 7yr old with my ex of 10yrs. I am finding it all emotionally hard as moved area for my ex a year ago and so want to move back to my family and friends. He dumped me for a new single life then promptly moved in with a woman he had been seeing whilst with me. Its so hard not to be bitter but am being civil for our sons sake, i go one minute hating him and next missing him so much!

I cant wait to be a happy singleton as i feel i will never meet anyone else, thats my plan anyway but obviously i am very lonely as i dont really know people wher i live they all keep themselves to themselves.I cant move as my son is settled and everytime i mention it he crys saying he is happy here a dosnt want to move.

I wish i could fast forward my life and get over the grief and stop thinking about my failed relationship with my ex i suppose time is a healer.

anyway nice to meet you all.

Julie x

Hello Julie!

Welcome to the site!

Omg I couldn't believe what I was reading when I read your post! Exactly the same happened to me!

I also have 2 grown up sons 22 and 18 and now a little girl 6!

My ex left because of problems he had, but also was helped along the way, by a woman with 4 kids who he promptly moved in with and married! I was gutted, that after bringing up my boys, I was now back, stuck in a position I had found myself in when I was 22, was just starting to get some kind of life when I met my ex, who had no kids, I thought this was the "real thing" so when I found out I was expecting, I was dead chuffed. He left when our daughter was just 3.

I'm 3 years down the line now, and feel so much better, I think that when you have already been through the Sp bit once, its terrifying knowing what you have to go through again, and seeing your older kids fly the nest, and enjoying themselves, you kind of beat yourself up a bit, for being so silly and ending up back in the same situ.

That sounds selfish I know!but how I felt.

I spent alot of time licking my wounds, and creating a new life, so different from the first time I was an Sp, and after learning to be happy by myself, and building my confidence again, I have met someone, and taking things slowly. I have a bit of a social life, have a new circle of friends and feel settled.

I am so pleased you posted Julie! And yes time is a healer.

Take care of you and your little boy

J xx

thank you for your reply

I am glad you have have come out the other end so well, it really gives me hope that i will too.

i am licking my wounds at the moment but feeling optimistc ,as i feel i was in denial about my failed relationship for a long time. I have lots of tears of wasted 10yrs with him, but i have my son which is a possitive thing out of it! i dont think i fully healed from my 1st divorce,so i must do this now to be fully happy single parent thats what i would like.

julie x